Saturday, January 22, 2011


What's that, you're hosting dinner?  Yay!
I'll bring fruit salad.  Is that cool?
Oh, no?  Someone called dibs on that?
That's fine, I'll bring a mixed cheese tray.
Aw man, that's taken too?  Okay.
I can't have dairy anyway.
Well, how 'bout drinks?  Dessert?  Come on!
How many friends did you invite?
And why was I the last to know?
This feels a little like a slight.
Hey now, come on, I only kid.
This'll be fun -- can't wait to go!
So maybe I'll bring cups and plates?
They're always good to have, although
Environmentally, foam's bad,
And paper just disintegrates...
Scratch that, I'll just bring chips and guac.
That's safe, and something no one hates.
Wait, what'd you say?  I can't bring chips?
I guess you've got those.  What a shock.
You don't?  Well what, then?  What's the deal?
Uh huh, um, but -- no, you can talk.
I don't know who I am.
I saw your invite, though, for real!
I'd just assumed -- well, Facebook said--
All righty then, enjoy your meal.

Thursday, January 13, 2011


So in frisbee, it's when the defender
Floats on into the lane -- a game-ender
Only when it's done right;
Otherwise, it's just tight
For the offense's open contender.

But this poem's off the mark just a mite;
Poaching food's about what I should write.
That simmering splendor
Cooks proteins so tender...
They don't float, but it's love at first bite!